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sandysean13
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Name: Sean
Country: United States
State: Illinois
Metro: Sterling-RockFalls-Dixon
Birthday: 4/28/1991
Gender: Male
Interests: First off, I LOVE GOD!! He is amazing. I have grown so much in this past year, in fact, in these past few months. Anyways, I love doing lots of things. Theater is my biggest interest.
Expertise: I'm not exactly an expert at anything. I am just more knowledgeable on some subjects/areas than others. I will let God be the expert of all things. I will just allow Him to show me what I can become most advanced at...
Occupation: Student
Industry: School
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
MSN: vangoh_art@hotmail.com
Member Since:
11/2/2005
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| I just got baptized this past Sunday (August 19, 2007)... Here is my testimony I wrote:
To be honest, I came to Christ because I liked a
girl. I didn’t do it because I knew he could change my life, but to get
this girl. She was a Christian and made sure I knew it because she
would not go out with me unless I was also a Christian. I barely knew
what that word meant to begin with, but all I was focused on was
getting the girl. Sure, I knew who God and Jesus were, and I had even
attended Vacation Bible School and Sunday School. I had no idea,
though, what it meant to be a Christian. And when I would ask her, she
wouldn’t really tell me. Well, one night, at about 9:45 P.M. she calls
me. She has one question to ask and that’s, “Sean, would you like to be
a Christian?” I responded with a half-hearted, “Sure.” Remember, all I
wanted was to date this girl. Well, I prayed the prayer and on June 21,
2004 at 9:45 P.M. I accepted Christ into my life.
For a few years after that, I tried to do what I
thought was right. I went to church and I even joined the choir. I
never really did date that girl, and we’re not even friends anymore.
She helped me get started, but that stopped after awhile. I read my
Bible a little, but I just wasn’t getting out of it what I could. And
then Freshman year came. I decided that even though God had helped me
control my anger problem that he hadn’t been doing any good for me and
my life was basically the same. So, I walked away. I dropped my faith
and everything that went with it and cast it off as just another part
of my past. Well, God definitely still had plans for me because that
year he placed Paul Trotter in my gym and choir class, and Kayla
Davenport in my choir class also. I got to be ok friends with them
both, and then things got worse. I started dating a girl that helped me
get even further away from God. I picked up swearing again and went
into a deep depressive state. First semester flew by, and then second
semester started. Joining our choir class was a person I had only heard
of but never met: Kent Davenport. I thought that him joining meant that
Paul and I would just grow apart and that we would never be good
friends. I, at the time, said he was going to ruin my life, in choir
anyways. Well, for the time being, he didn’t. And Paul and I grew
closer, and I got to know Kent a little better. But my girlfriend and I
just kept getting worse. I asked her to not do the things to herself
she had been doing, but she continued. And my depression grew. Well, on
March 12, 2006, that was a Sunday, I sent Paul Trotter a message on
MySpace asking him to help me get back with God because I was at my
lowest point. And he did. And then, sometime during choir I asked Kent
about the back of a camp shirt that he was wearing. Ironically enough,
it had the word “race” which stood for “Radically Active Christian
Experience.” I could not wait for camp to start. It was only five
months away. To keep me going, Paul got me involved in the Sterling
First Youth Group and I started regularly attending LivingWell in
Dixon.
Camp arrived soon enough, though. It changed my life
forever. I was sanctified at camp, and totally sold myself to Christ.
This past year, I went through many ups and downs, but God pulled me
through it all. Recently, I attended the Nazarene Youth Conference and
accepted my calling into full-time ministry. And then soon after that,
I attended District Convention where my calling was further defined as
Pastoral ministries. I’m excited for the future and what God will be
doing.
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| Wow... so, I can't really post anything about NYC. Nothing but one
thing stands out. Yes, NYC was amazing, I learned and grew a lot, but
God really helped confirm one thing. I'll tell you about it. So,
picture this:
It's Saturday night, the last evening
service to happen (which is really sad), and, once again, the NWIL
district is sitting in the top section, or section three. It's along
ways down to the floor where the music and speakers are. Well,
Starfield (an amazing worship band) was playing, and the speaker was
talking about how much God could transform our lives. This whole time
I'm thinking that I need to get down to that altar, but I'm never the
one to lead the way. So, I think that before the end of the song
currently playing that I will go down to pray. Well, right before the
last line Kayla goes down to pray. Sign? I think so. So, I follow a few
seconds later. Find an open spot and start pouring myself out to God.
No tears, kind of just confirmation. I pray about everything that
happened that week and give lots of things in my life over to him. I
hardly remember what I prayed for, except for this one thing. I get
around to praying for my calling. And for awhile now, I've felt that I
would either go into some sort of full-time ministry or theatre (as far
as acting). Well, I start saying, "God if you want me to go into
full-time ministry have someone place a hand on my back to start
praying for me, or have them play a favorite song of mine, or recite a
verse I know by heart (and that is many verses). If you know me,
though, I hate bargaining with God. You know what I'm talking about!
Those times where you are desperate to understand what God is saying so
you start giving him ideas to help you know. You name off a few signs
hoping he'll answer in those ways, but that's hardly ever the case. But
this night was different. I usually stop myself before I get to far
into giving ideas, but that night I just rattled off a few. Well, I
finished up praying for that and started surrendering more things to
God when lo and behold a hand is placed squarely on my back. WOW! I was
so surprised I couldn't help but smile. I love God, and how much he
takes me off guard. And you know what, I thought I would have a problem
accepting a calling like that, accounting on I love theatre, well, I
don't. I'm am completely excited to be doing something like that for
God. And that's exactly the reason why: it's FOR GOD! If you must do
something, at least do it FOR GOD! And that, ladies and gentlemen, is
my awesome NYC 2007 story.
Keep seeking God,
Sean
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| School is out which means summer has started. And why should this
summer be any different? Why did I even expect anything to be any
different than the last one, or the one before that, or all the ones in
my life? It all starts with me getting my hopes up that this will be a
great summer and it's going to be different from the last. Summer
slowly approaches and last minute school things are accomplished...
Then before I know it, it strikes like a bolt of lightning out of
nowhere making a big indent in the ground and a lot of hurt to be
cleaned up. Don't get me wrong, I love summer... just not everything
that ensues. WHY? Why did I not see this coming? Once again I'm the one
doing all the calling and inviting, but no one is calling me. I do
something that several people would probably rather have me not do. I
have time, but no one has time for me. But when I don't have time,
everyone has time for each other. I feel so alone, left out, abandoned,
excluded, so on and so forth. And if they are my friends shouldn't they
be making the effort, too? I don't know how many times I've asked
someone to hang out, they say no, and then I find out a few days later
they were asked to do something after I had asked and they went and did
that instead. Or some excuse always arises. WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? Why
can't I just have a friend that wants to hang out and makes the effort
to do so? Why can't I just have friends that don't want to pick on me?
That brings me to a new point? DO I HIDE MY FRUSTRATION THAT WELL OR IS
IT JUST FUN TO WATCH ME GET UPSET? I don't understand. I could be the
nicest person in the world and everyone would still pick on me. Do I
have a sign on me that says, "Please, pick on me!"? Have I not been
picked on enough? I thought that was part of the reason I got new
friends, so I wouldn't always be the one taking crap from everyone. And
even when I do confront the problem, it doesn't change. And when others
confront it for me, it still doesn't. Honestly, I don't like to be
picked on. It's one of my greatest pet peeves. I just want to scream,
or cry, or yell or something when it's happening. I actually tend to
feel worthless when it happens. But, you know, it's Sean, and I'll get
over it... Anyways, that's my rant of the evening...
Lord, please help me to take life
easier. Guide my steps and calm this sea called Life that I'm sailing
on. I can't take it anymore. Jesus, I need you. Take over. Take the
wheel of this boat and steer it home to you. PLEASE! I need all of you.
Take all of me. Thank you. AMEN!
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| I am having a really bad week:
-Didn't get into CATS
-Didn't win Drama Club President
Yeah, it's bound to get worse because I really wanted both of these
things to happen... But, I guess God has something else planned... i'm
just really down... :(
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| On your birthday...
It's nice to be remembered by family
It's nice to be remembered by classmates
It's nice to be remembered by acquaintances
It's nice to be remembered by friends
It's nice to be remembered by best friends
Is it really that hard? Or am I just being petty?
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